Cosmic consciousness

Esalen Institute, Big Sur

Monday October 31, 2011  Lyle is a work scholar. Says he’s a recovering addict ".. but not the way you think." I'm suspicious. He’s on a mission to give voice to his experience with ayahuasca. We’re sitting in the lodge at Esalen. He seems genuinely grateful that I’m willing to listen. Even blows off a  female admirer. Says he’ll see her in the baths later on and she takes off. He continues. “I completely left my body ..I could see it lying crumpled on the floor but I didn’t feel any attachment to it. Then I lost complete sense of myself. I felt like vapor with no trace of ‘Lyle’. I entered a hole ..some people call it a ‘K-hole’ but whatever ..it took me out of this world ..where I flew weightless and untethered ..but still connected somehow to my buddies ..we entered a cosmic realm where speaking wasn’t necessary.” Lyle gives me a look like 'the intellect isn't of much value here'. He goes on to say “We encountered beings from other parts of the cosmos ..unfortunately I have little memory of them ..that’s why I want to go back so badly ..that's the addiction.” Now his fists are clenched and he looks like he’s chomping at the bit. He goes on to say “Coming back to this plane was a slow process ..I had to struggle to re-unite with my body ..then I gradually became aware of my surroundings ..and my buddies. Honestly, I’m not really sure how long it took but it seemed like hours. I struggled to regain my speech. But anything we tried to say about the experience fell short and sounded cheap.” He slumped back. “The only thing addictive about it is how curious I am to go back there and explore some more ..plus regain the feeling of weightlessness.” He leaves me with an interesting anecdote. They use ayahuasca, along with pain relievers, to treat soldiers injured in battle. It wipes out the memory of their traumatic experience.