I subscribe to the theory that roughly two-thirds of what I experience is made-up – based on mixed memories triggered by what's in front of me. Since everyone arrives at this moment from a different past, we can each have a different take on what's happening now. Collaboration helps narrow things down a bit – but I suck at that, which places me somewhere on the fringe. I’ve learned to compensate by going along (biting my tongue, smiling and nodding at the appropriate times). I haven’t been committed yet. There’s a fine line between experience and delusion. Delusions take place when the gap between the present tense and the past events it triggers gets so wide that I have to start making shit up in order to bridge the two. And into that gap go the most frightening things. That’s when I start to mistake a rope for a snake or a smile for the mythical Wildebeest. Sometimes I see alligators in the bathroom. Those are the times I smile the most. Takes the edge off. But then my actions start to veer dangerously from what I think …and the errors compound daily.
